chapter 1

So we've been in TX for almost two weeks now. It's hard to believe that it hasn't been longer than that. The last fortnight has seemed to drag. Each day dripping by slowly without an inkling of when they'll pick up. I think that having no job probably has a lot to do with this feeling. I've been trying to keep busy with painting. I only have so much canvas on hand though and I can't afford more until I start getting a paycheck.

I'd keep busy unpacking but the thing is, we barely brought anything with us, so there's nothing to unpack. It's hard to look at our empty, oversized apartment and not want to go back to a month ago and be at home, in Michigan.

I'm trying really hard to feel grateful. I'm trying not to think about how much I miss my family and friends constantly. It's an empty sort of feeling, when you leave everyone you know. I've been trying really hard not to think about them because when I do, I want to crawl into bed, wrap my arms around my legs and cry for hours. It's been hard, but I'm trying to remain calm about it. Trying to keep a smile on my face.

I know that being here is something I should be grateful for. My husband has done so much to make this major change possible. And it's what I wanted. I wanted to come to Texas to pursue a teaching career. I do not regret that because it's my dream. I just hate that this opportunity had to be so far away from the place I've known as my home my entire life.

It's also been hard because we need jobs NOW. We need some little jobs to keep our bills paid until we can get teaching jobs. It's depressing, applying at places that I would work at if I was 18 and didn't have a Bachelor's degree. But, it's what I need to do to get where I want to be.

Baby steps, right?

Right now it feels like there's so much that needs to be done. But I don't even know where to begin. All I keep thinking about is that we need shelves so we can put up our pictures. That we need a couch so we can have somewhere to sit besides folding chairs. That I wish our front window didn't look directly across into our neighbors' front window. That I wish we could afford to go out for a drink with our friends. That the walls look so empty and I want to paint them. That we aren't pregnant yet. It never ends.

I'm so distracted and I feel like my mind is being pulled in 50 different directions.

I've been thinking about writing a novel. I have a mediocre idea that I'm playing around with in my head. But we shall see if anything actually pans out or not. I'm the worst at starting things like that and then never doing anything with them. I have countless notebooks from my childhood with the beginnings of possible stories, with character names, what they'd look like, and an outline for the general plot. It never went anywhere. So we'll see where this goes....probably nowhere.

So, as a born-and-bred Michigander, there are some things I'd like to say about just how different Texas is.
1. They serve beer bread at a lot of restaurants instead of just rolls. Which is AMAZING, but probably not very good for me. It's got a spongy texture to it, so it just kinda seems fattening. Who knows.
2. Not everyone has a Texan accent. A lot of people who live here aren't from here, *thanks crappy economy!* So it's like, not only a melting pot of people of different races from the south, but of tons of people from ALL OVER the US. It's a neat little jumble of people which makes for trying to find cool places to go a little difficult, because none of us are from here, so we dunno what to do.
3. You never really know what kind of an area you're in. By that I mean, I went to school in a crappy town in MI and I knew that it was crappy because of the area and how it looked (run down, abandoned, etc...) and here it's like, there are some abandoned buildings then multi-million dollar mansions. It's strange....
4. There are no Meijers. This is weird for me. I've always had the 24 hour store with everything. Ok, now I have a 24 hour Kroger, but sorry folks, Kroger is NO Meijer.

I'm sure I will come up with more MI-TX differences, but for now that's it.


I'm hoping that this blog can be a way for our family and friends up in the mitten to follow our lives and whatnot. Please read it. :-)