stained

So, it's probably weird that it's taken so long for this to happen, but for some reason I feel the need to blog about it. Penny has officially ruined a onesie. She's had poop explosions before, but apparently this one didn't want to come out in the wash.

I don't know why but I feel like this is a milestone or something. I'm sure it's not. It's not one of those things on all the baby checklists that moms eagerly wait to cross off as their little one accomplishes something. Well, I'm crossing it off mine!

Penny's poop ruined a onesie!

Haha, I laugh just reading that. Wow, this is my life.

On another note, have you seen the Luv's diaper commercial where the babies are having a pooping contest and are being judged on how much they can poop without their diaper exploding? It's ridiculous and funny, hrm...maybe I should get Penny some Luv's since she had one blowout that ruined a dang onesie!

I'm still working on my list, I need some help. I'm only at #67! I still need 34 more things for my list! I need ideas, so get on it people! Help me out here!

Here's some recent shots of Penners:

(side note: I cannot figure out how to make the font smaller, blogger seems to not want to work with me today...)

Trying rice cereal for the first time

Daddy and Penelope

Playing with her teether, she stuck it on her face like this and then starting freaking out because she couldn't figure out how to move it!

Trying to get her down to sleep, she was fighting it pretty hard at this point.

This was her, two minutes later.

My mother-in-law posted some of her pics from Xmas and this one was just too cute for words.

She pretty much rocks my world. :-)

Twenty thousand and ten

So many of the blogs that I read have been doing "a year in review" sort of post lately. So I thought I might do one too.

This time last year, I was working for a great bookstore, and was getting ready to ring in the New Year with some of our Texan friends. Little did I know, that soon I would be pregnant with our first child and sick with the flu.

Now, going through the following images to try to find some for each month, I realized that I did a crap job of keeping my photos organized on my computer, so some of these pics kind of suck. So that's resolution numero uno: get better at organizing photos on my computer! Quit being lazy about it! Ok, so here we go!

January

I created these paintings because I was so pissed that Texas has a lack of seasonal change. There's the godawful heat and humidity March through November, and then December through February is just chilly rainy garbage, so I wanted to create something I felt represented the seasons. Also, the Keep Calm and Carry On was something I've seen lots of places and I didn't want to pay someone else for since I could just make it myself, so I did. I thought it was a nice thing to remember during stressful days.

February
This was huge. We found out that I was pregnant with what would soon be our little Penelope Mae. It was an emotional time and we were so excited to finally be expecting our little one. I actually took three tests, but for some reason only took a picture of the two. Not really sure why...oh and just in case you were thinking it, yep, I sure did pee on those. Haha

March
We decided to go to Galveston, TX one day since we were so close to the ocean and hadn't actually gone to see it yet. It was a fun day and it was a pretty enjoyable 65 degree day. We collected a lot of shells on the beach and walked for awhile. We had fun discussing our little one in my belly and taking pictures. Here's Jim forcing a smile for me.

April
April in Texas is Bluebonnet season. So a coworker took me to an orchard so I could see them. We got there and there were none. Slight disappointment but we ended up seeing a small patch of them on the side of the road on the way home so we stopped and got a few shots. They were pretty.

May
This month was a big deal because we finally got to have our big ultrasound and found out that we were having a little girl! We were so excited and happy at the news. Just a month before this, we were taking my 15 week photos and we saw a ladybug on Jim's car, and I said, "It's an omen, we're having a girl," and low and behold, I was right!

June
In June, we got to go to Michigan and visit our families and friends. It was a much needed vacation from TX and we were so glad to be home. This trip solidified for us our love for MI and how much we wanted to raise our family there. This photo is of us in front of the Big Boy restaurant we met at when I was 17.

July

We had our baby showers and I kept getting bigger and bigger. I felt so wonderful while we were there. The second trimester was super enjoyable and I felt awesome. It was sad though when we had to make the 2 day trip back down to TX, we were both pretty distraught.


August
August was uneventful for us. We did a lot of working and setting up Penny's side of our room. I love this picture because it captured my big super round belly and my motherly feelings. I felt so beautiful and ready to meet my little girl. I chose the crescent moon shape because I thought it looked kind of like my tummy. :-)
September This picture was taken on my 26th birthday. I bought this super cute dress just for my weekly photo, and I don't think it'll fit me again until I'm that pregnant again someday. We spent my birthday watching movies and had a home cooked spaghetti dinner and had cream puffs with chocolate sauce for dessert! SO good! These were the last few weeks before Penelope arrived, so we tried to spend as much time together as we could, just enjoying our last moments as just the two of us.

October
October was one of the best months of my life. On October 7th, 2010, we met our baby girl, Penelope Mae! If you want to read the birth story, go here. I love this picture that the nurse captured for us. She got a lot of great shots for us and I can't thank her enough for that. The whole experience was magical. I can't wait to do it all over again! ;-)

November
November was a huge month for change. We moved back to Michigan from Texas and Hubby moved in with my brother so he could work and I stayed with my parents for 6 weeks until we could afford a new apartment. Lots of change but all SO good! This was taken at Thanksgiving with Jim's family.



December
December was a great month for us. We finally got to move into our new home and spent the holidays with our families, which was perfect because last year we didn't get to spend it with them. Penelope hit the 12 week mark and I can't believe how big she is already! She's growing so fast and as of this week is 12 lbs. 2 oz. Almost doubling her birth weight! She did have her first ear infection though, of which she's still trying to get better from. I just hate seeing my little girl so congested! Anyways, this is one of my favorite pictures of Penelope so far. She's so lovely, and we just adore her.

Overall though, 2010 was a good year. We learned so much about ourselves, I learned just how much pressure and pain I can really handle, and we brought an inspiring, gorgeous, vivacious, talkative, giggly, smiley, happy little girl into the world. We are very lucky to be where we're at in our lives. We are so grateful.

Resolutions are funny things, people promising to do things in their lives that they probably won't really do, or at least won't do for long. So my list isn't a bunch of resolutions, it's a bunch of things I hope that I'll get to do this next year, most of which will involve Penny.

• Take Penny to the zoo for the first time. I'm so looking forward to doing this in the summer time. Jim and I love going to the zoo and have gone just about every year since we've been together I think, so I'm so excited to make Penny a part of this tradition!
• Take LOTS AND LOTS of pictures of Penny. I want to record her life as much as I can. I want to be able to look back on these moments in time and see how she's grown and changed. I'd *really* love a new camera though...
• I want to keep up on my reading. Since Penny's been born, I haven't read anything, unless it's online. But no books, no magazines, nothing. This is terrible! I'm hoping that as she gets a little older and sleeps more consistently, that I can plan some time each day to spend diving into a good book! Got any good suggestions for me?
• Clever Characters. Most of you probably know about my little side business, you know, the one where I design and paint kids names onto canvas for a reasonable price? Check it out here if you wanna see what I can do. I'm looking forward to ending my hiatus (I took a few months off after Penny was born because well, newborns keep ya busy) and looking forward to redesigning the website and getting better at what I do.
  
• Cooking. Since I'm now an official Stay-At-Home-Mama, I want to learn to cook more than pasta and pizza. And I want to learn how to enjoy it. Right now, I'll cook something if it's reasonably easy and doesn't involve all kinds of measuring and temperature changes and whatever else. I want to expand my mind and my abilities, so I'm hoping I can try to learn to enjoy cooking this year. If I can't, oh well, we'll just eat pizza and pasta, and sometimes chicken or something. Haha

Let's hope 2011 bring even more love and happiness to us! And same to all of you, my few readers! I wish you all the very best this new year! Maybe I'll try to update more! Who knows!?

***For the record, I couldn't figure out how to fix the sizing on this post, which is why it's all over the damn place. Sorry!***

10 weeks

Penelope is 10 weeks old today.

I love her.

WOW

So the past 6 weeks have FLOWN by. I can't even believe that

Penelope is already 6 weeks old.

Being a mama has been incredible in many ways. Incredibly great and incredibly stressful at times. I really didn't think I was going to survive those first few weeks; those weeks when Penelope would scream for hours on end and I had no idea how to help her, those weeks when we had to scrape for money to buy diapers and wipes instead of food for us, those weeks when I didn't sleep for more than an hour or two at a time because she was cluster feeding, those weeks that I didn't have a breast pump, those weeks when we worried about how bills would get paid when only Hubby would be going back to work, those weeks when I didn't shower for a few days in a row and felt terrible from the after-labor period. I really thought we wouldn't survive it, but miraculously we did! And we're going STRONG!

Penelope is thriving and growing like a weed. The power of breast milk blows me away! I always knew that I wanted to breastfeed my baby, from the moment I found out I was pregnant I knew that I wanted to give my baby the very best I could give her, and breast milk is it! That first doctor's appointment when my doctor told me that Penelope was doing great on my breast milk made me so happy. I was over the moon that she was doing so well and that we were succeeding with breastfeeding since I felt kind of like I wasn't doing it right and that I must be screwing something up, but NO! Penelope is doing great and growing so fast, almost too fast!

Just look that those blue eyes!

A lot has happened since Penelope's birth, and the main thing is this: WE'VE MOVED BACK TO MICHIGAN!!! Hubby got a great job and so we packed everything up and headed back home to MI, and we could not be happier about it! It was Penelope's first car ride longer than 30 minutes, so needless to say, we were a bit worried about how well she'd do in the car that long (3 DAYS, holy crap) Well, she did pretty darn good! She slept about 80% of the time,
and didn't make me want to pull my hair out! (well, except those few times I had to change her poopy diapers in the back of our cramped and packed to the brim Focus!) She only had one meltdown on the last day,
and it was a short one, she just had to get out of that dang car seat, and honestly, I do not blame her! Those things seem so terribly uncomfortable.

Rupert did great in the car too, except when Hubby had to get out of the car (to get gas/food/etc...), then he was all "Where's he going, why can't I go too?"

So we've been in MI for a few days now, and I gotta tell you, it's so good to be home. In some ways I feel really spoiled now because since we're staying with my folks for a few weeks, it's like, there's HELP available now. I'm so used to doing everything myself, and with Hubby's help, but now I've got Grandma and Grandpa too! I feel so lucky to have this help, I know many folks don't have the help they need, and a new baby is a crap ton of work! How single moms do this, I have no idea, but damn ladies, I admire you so very very much. It takes a lot of strength to do this mama gig, and to do it without support, wow. just wow.

Here's a few more cute pics of Penelope:

Breastfeeding has been going well. The 3 day road trip kind of screwed my stash I had going, I was about 10 or so feedings ahead of Penny, and now I'm just feeding on demand with no stash to back me up. So it's been stressful lately, but I made it to my first goal of 6 weeks! I'm so proud of myself, breastfeeding isn't a walk in the park, especially at first, but we've kind of gotten into a groove and it feels good to know that I'm giving Penny the best that I can give her! My next goal is 6 months! Wish me luck!

Right now, Hubby has started his new job, and it's on the other side of the state, so he's staying with my brother for now, and I'm with my folks. So I won't lie, it's been rough without him here, but he's laying the foundation for our lives, for our future, so I'm doing what I can and trying to keep busy. But I'm missing him like crazy! We'll see each other on weekends, but I hope we can be reunited for good soon! I'm so proud of him and feel so happy that he's found a job that will challenge him. He takes such good care of us, I'm a lucky woman.

I've recently found out that 5 of my friends are pregnant and are due in March, April, and May! I'm so excited for these ladies and their families! I honestly miss being pregnant and am so stoked that these gals are expanding their lives (and their bellies!) and bringing more beautiful babies into the world. I think I'll be busy painting for them next spring! :)

I promise I will try to update this thing more! I'm planning a new design and possibly a blog name change since I'm no longer residing in TX...we'll see though, that might be too big of a pain.

a moment of clarity

So tonight I had a moment of clarity.

Let me explain.

For the past 9 months, I've been thinking and over-thinking and rethinking my upcoming labor/delivery (only 4ish weeks away!) I've been fearing it and stressing out about it, which I know is the worst thing a woman can do in preparation for her natural, medication-free birthing experience. I know it's going to hurt, DUH, but I was terrified as to how I'll handle it.

Tonight, before bed, Hubby and I were going through our bag that's partially packed for when it's GO TIME! I was folding up one of the three outfits we're packing for Penelope to bring her home in (since we don't know just how big or how small she'll be) and I had this moment, where everything in my mind felt right.

All the fear I had in my heart was gone. All I could think about was that in a few short weeks, Penelope will be in one of those outfits, on her way home with us. I realized that no matter how much pain I go through, that in the end, Penelope will be here safe and sound and that it was all worth it.

A few hours of my life in pain will not compare to the amazing amounts of happiness that Penelope will bring to us. And that, is exactly why I'm going to be OK, why this labor and delivery will be successful and beautiful.

Now I can't wait to meet her. I'm so ready for this pregnancy to come to its close and for our little ladybug to be here.
Hubby and I talk daily about her and how awesome it's going to be to be parents, HER parents.
How ready we are.
How excited we are.
The things we're worried about, but mostly, we talk about the things we can't wait to do, can't wait to experience with Penelope.
The places we want to take her.
The things we want to show her that we love and hope she does too.
The people who she has waiting for her here on the outside who already love her so much and cannot wait to share that love with her.
How we can't wait to take pictures of all of her firsts, her facial expressions, and her explorations of the outside world.


There's so much we can't wait for.

15 weeks

Sorry it's been awhile since I've updated! I feel like I blinked and that last two weeks have just gone by!

So last week we had our monthly appointment with the midwife, Janet. We got to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time, and Hubby took a video of it. Here's the video! The goofy noise is me laughing and making the doppler go crazy!


We also made the date for our gender anatomy ultrasound, May 19th! I cannot wait to find out what we're having!

Today, Hubby and I went to a park near our house to take my 15 week photo and we saw a ladybug on our car. I think it's a sign that we're having a girl since I want to do her room in a Ladybug theme. So we'll see!!

Here are my 15 week photos:
Me and Hubby

Just me, the forest nymph. haha!



OK OK, enough of that, now it's time for more Things that I Love!

First, this baby pop art is SO awesome.


This baby bib is too cute, and it's gender neutral which is a plus. :)


This headband is beautiful! I love the dark blue/teal flower and how adorable it looks on this little girl!


This hat for a little boy is so darn cute. I know I could probably make it but I also just love this picture, look at his blue eyes!


I really think the whole Mama Bird idea is really beautiful. This necklace is gorgeous and I think once I have a few babies I just might make one like this.


So Mother's Day is coming up. I hate that I won't be in MI to give the women in my life who are momma's the hugs and love they deserve. Also, I'm curious, were any of you preggo during Mother's Day? Should we celebrate it? Should we not? I have no idea...

I hope all is well! Me and baby are doing great and will continue to do so! :-)

All the love I have,
M.

The Wonderful World of Michigan

Have you ever been to Michigan?

I love it, but I think I'm a little biased being that I was lucky enough to grow up there.

I cannot stress enough how much I love Michigan. And the sad part is that I never knew how much I loved it until I left it. I guess I needed to get out for awhile to really appreciate what I had there.

I never knew that by leaving everyone I love behind (except Hubby of course) that it would create a massive hole in my heart. I should have known, but I didn't really. I thought we'd be ok. That it would be fine being away from family on holidays and on important occasions.

But honestly, even not being there on any random day of the week is ridiculously hard. I miss being able to go to my parents' house to have dinner with them. I miss being there to talk with Hubby's parents about anything because we could.

I hate the fact that I've missed my goddaughter's first steps, words, everything. That I've missed my nephew growing into a little boy. These things that we're missing aren't things that can be replaced or made-up. These are things that happen in a brief instant of time and when you're not there, you've missed it. That's it. It's gone.

I miss Kensington. I miss going on 8 mile hikes a few times a week with Mik. I miss having my closest friends within an hour drive from me. I took that for granted when I lived there.

I miss being able to go to Pentwater during the summer.

I miss being able to go to the restaurant where I met my husband.

I miss being able to make plans on the fly with friends and not having to get time off work and buy a plane ticket.

I miss my best friends.

I miss my parents.

I miss everything about Michigan, even the frickin' snow.

I hate that it's the beginning of April and it's averaging 80+ degrees here. It's springtime. This is summer in MI.

I hate it here. I really do. It's not home, and to be honest, it's never going to feel like home. I know why the Texans love it, because it's THEIR home. It's not mine.

I of course don't mean to offend anyone who lives in TX, I've loved exploring it and being able to go to the ocean.

But honestly, I need to be at least near MI. I'm a midwesterner, and I'm damn proud of it.

Hubby and I have been SO homesick lately. It's easy to say, "oh you'll get used to it, it'll grow on you." But really, with a baby on the way, I can't imagine my child's life so far away from the rest of our family. I don't want to raise my child not really knowing their grandparents.

Like I said, we want to at least be near MI, so we're considering Indiana, but eventually, we WILL be back in MI. Once the economy turns around and we can actually get jobs there, we will be back there as soon as we can.

Michigan is OUR HOME.



Sorry if this is depressing, but I needed to get this out of my head.

I'm 13 weeks now. Here's my weekly pic:


We had to switch our birthing center again. The one we were going to wasn't covered by our insurance, but thankfully this one is, and it's basically the same, except another 20 minutes away from home. I'll have a natural water birth with midwives, and a hospital is literally right next door in case the baby is breech or something. I'm glad we finally have it figured out!

We wont' find out for another 7 weeks what we're having, and that is driving me insane! I want to know so bad!

I've been talking a lot to family this week about our upcoming MI trip. Both our moms are planning baby showers for us. All I know is, we are so loved and I am so grateful for all these people in my life. We are endlessly lucky.

I love our family and friends.

xo
mere

11 weeks

I'm now 11 weeks along. One more week and I'll officially be done with the first trimester! yay! Check me out:


What's weird about taking these photos, is that I look a lot bigger at night than I do in the daytime. In the daytime I don't look like I have a bump, but in this pic it sure looks like I do! Right?

I'm really hoping once I start showing more I can do something better for my weekly photos. Something more artsy and cute. We'll see. Hubby and I have to come up with something. :)

So, how is everyone today? I'm feeling pretty darn good actually. I'm still kinda wiped out, but I'm feeling better mentally. I'm feeling really excited and finally feeling happier. Not that I wasn't happy or something, but my doc took me off my anti-depressants so I was feeling kind of down in the dumps for a few weeks. I think I'm finally on the up and up!

Work is going well. I really love my job. I go to work every day and I love being there. I was talking to my friend Dori today and was telling her how excited we are about going to MI this summer. We talked about how hard it is to leave your family and pick up your life and start somewhere new. It got me thinking that we're really lucky that our coworkers are (for the most part) awesome people. Without knowing them, we wouldn't know anyone and we'd be really unhappy. I truly believe that some of these folks will be in our lives for a loooooong time. I feel lucky to know them, they've opened their hearts to us and I'm so grateful for that.

Especially since getting pregnant, it's really shown me that some of them truly care about us and our well being and our future. It means a lot to us, seriously.

Something funny about pregnancy, I've never loved drinking orange juice so much. I seriously can't get enough. Specifically, Tropicana Tangerine Orange. OMG it's so tasty.

Tomorrow, Hubby and I both have the day off. Who knows what we'll do, but I know we've gotta send out some mail. I've got a birthday present to send and two Easter gifts! Maybe we'll clean this pigsty of an apartment. haha!

I think I need this shirt:

I think Jim needs this, hehe:



goodnight!
xo.
M

wednesday

Hi all,

As of yesterday, I am now 10 weeks along in my pregnancy. Our little babe is the size of a kumquat, which apparently is like a tiny, oblong orange. See?

So my sister-in-law is also preggo right now. She's due in August and she's finding out this week sometime what she's having! I can't wait to find out if Hubby and I will have a niece or nephew this summer!

So I've been thinking A LOT about how we get to go to Michigan this summer. I am ecstatic about this trip. I wish we had more time than 11 days to spend up there. I feel like it's not enough time to do what we want to do. It's not enough time to see everyone we want to see enough.

I wish we had time to go to Mackinac Island. It's one of my favorite places in Michigan and Hubby and I had our honeymoon there. It was an unplanned honeymoon and it was 3 of the most relaxed days of my life.

I know that I'll be going to Kensington Metropark, one of our favorite close-to-home getaways. It has a FABULOUS 8 mile hiking trail and if I wasn't going to be 6 months preggo by then, I'd go do it, but being that I will be, I'm thinking the 8 mile hike that used to kick my butt every time isn't the best idea. hah!


Anyways, lately I've been working a lot on my crafts. Not just my painting, although I've been doing that too, but I've been quite inspired by book art lately. I'll explain this better once my projects are done, and of course I'll post some pics on here. They involve wall art and a book page wreath, so stay tuned!

Also, could this bookcase be any cooler? I can imagine painting it some awesome bronze color or something and having it in my bedroom. I want it!


Goodnight all!

if we have a boy

Ok, so I've been thinking a lot about the baby's room and how I want to design it. I know I said a moon and stars theme and I think that's just going to be a general guideline for it. If we have a boy, I'd love to do a robots theme! How fun, right?

Our kid is going to be a sci-fi dork like us, especially since he'll be named after Fox Mulder of the X-Files!

Here are some of the images I have in my idea file on my computer!

Hobby Lobby currently has these awesome robotic rocker dudes. I almost bought them the other day but I stopped myself because obviously we don't know what we're having yet. I'm so worried they'll be gone though by the time we do find out! I actually almost bought Hubby the motorcycle one because I know he'd love it....what do you think, Hubby?




This was a really cute robot painting I found on Etsy that I could totally recreate if we wanted to. I thought it was just really sweet.


These are some super graphic robot wall decals which are great because they're easy to use and easy to remove when you decide to change themes.


This was a really cool outerspace-y lamp that has my favorite planet, Saturn, on it. For those of you who know me, I have Saturn tattooed on my arm along with the other beautiful gas planets.


OK, isn't this robot plushie the cutest thing you've ever seen? I want one! Even if we don't have a boy, I want one! I found it here.


This is an awesome toddler shirt. I love the mint green color and the vintage looking robot on it. I found it here.


This robot onesie melted my heart! Isn't it precious?


In a few days I'll post the stuff I'm finding for a little girls room. I can't wait to find out what we're having!!! ahhh!!!!

In other news, we've officially decided when we'll be going to visit our families in June. I cannot wait to see our families and give them the millions of hugs we've been missing out on since we've moved. I miss everyone so terribly and think about our trip daily! We'll get just about 2 weeks off so I cannot wait!!!

I also can't wait to see our friends. I know Hubby keeps saying, "when we go to Michigan, I'm going to go out drinking with the news team for two days." (Anchorman reference) meaning he's going to hang out with his friends, and I can't be more excited for him, and ME! I miss my best friends and while the folks we've met down here are awesome, and I'm so grateful to have met them all, it's a whole other experience when talking about my girls.

My girls are my rock, my support, my sisters.